


Just Focus On Me

by CalamityRondo



Series: Attention Whore [6]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Comforting, Fighting, Kissing, Louis tries to be a good friend, M/M, almost break-up, insecure!harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-18
Updated: 2013-09-18
Packaged: 2017-12-26 23:15:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/971428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalamityRondo/pseuds/CalamityRondo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Harry shows up at his door heartbroken, Louis is determined to cheer him up like any friend would do. Some old sparks ignite again even though nothing serious happens between them, and Louis just ends up confused what Harry's reals feelings are.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Focus On Me

**Author's Note:**

> I'm am SO terribly sorry that it took this much time to put this up. After finally being through with exams and papers, I haven't had Internet for over a month. Sorry to keep you all waiting like this, but now it will definitely go forward again!  
> Thanks to all those lovely people who are still reading and haven't lost faith in me ♥

Louis' world is spinning. It's going back and forth and spins like it's doing pirouettes. It's like someone took it off its hinges and dropped it carelessly to crash at Louis' feet. Louis has to shake his whole body to snap out of it, to focus back at Harry who still looks at him like a kicked puppy.

“Did you tell her?”, he hisses, and he really shouldn't be that angry, because it's Harry's right to tell his wife about his (accidental?) cheating, but Louis is not prepared for a rightfully raging Taylor to come and punch him to an inch of his life for doing that. He would have liked some sort of warning before Harry told her.

The taller rakes a shaking hand through the mess of curls on his head.

“No, I didn't. It's not because of that.”

That leaves Louis stranded. What would make Taylor break up with Harry if not the wrong her husband has done her together with Louis? It has to be something trivial, something most couples go through, and it relieves Louis, although it shouldn't, but everything is better than being found out.

He takes a step toward Harry and—he knows it's not a good idea to initiate physical contact—wraps Harry in his arms. He feels smaller in his arms than he is, as if they are back in high school. Harry reciprocates the embrace. It's the most contact they have had for weeks, but Louis can feel that this is totally platonic and that Harry just needs some support right now.

“Shh, it's okay. Fights happen to everyone, Harry. You'll two get over it.”

“I sure hope so.”

It actually breaks Louis' heart a little how insecure Harry sounds, how he doubts his own words. He may have some issues with Harry, but right now all he wants to do is wrap him in his arms and protect him from everything. He is ridiculously angry at Taylor for hurting Harry like this, for being the one person who should make him happy the most and completely doing the opposite.

He finds himself thinking that Taylor doesn't deserve this—Harry—and the marriage, but he quickly shakes that thought from his head, because it's not his place to judge Harry's choice.

"Come on, Harry, let's get you inside. We will get your mind off things for a while."

* * *

They end up on the couch that Louis doesn't sleep on anymore, and he would have avoided it just for the memories he has of himself and Harry on this thing, but then he would have to take him to his bedroom and that is even dumber than some old couch thingy in the living area. He even makes tea for him and settles for some stupid movie rerun on TV—because he doesn't want to remind Harry of his problems by making him watch trashy reality shows.

He has no idea how they end up cuddling—maybe it's because he has tried to make Harry feel better by using human contact—but after a while Louis is lying with his back against the back of the couch, Harry curled up in front of him. They watch that movie although Louis has still no idea which it even is. Louis' arm is loosely draped over Harry, and he feels slightly out of place being the big spoon since he can't spoon Harry properly—he wouldn't see the TV if he did.

They haven't talked at all during the last 30 minutes and Louis thinks Harry might have calmed down by now, but he is surprised when Harry suddenly speaks up.

"She thinks I'm not good enough for her."

Louis has to grind his teeth together to keep himself from spewing very inappropriate words about Taylor and what's even going on in that unattractively pretty head of hers.

"Why?", is what he simply settles with. Harry sighs and his whole frame moves with the action. Louis' idea was to avoid talking with Harry about what has happened—although he has been dying to know—because he wanted him to feel better, not worse. But now that Harry has started talking himself, Louis can't back off, he just has to know exactly what's going on. It's so much easier being angry at someone if you know what you are angry for.

"She is so famous now."

Harry's voice is low and a little sad, it breaks Louis' heart all over again. He knows it's true, he hasn't exactly kept track of Taylor's doing, but it's difficult nowadays to not see her face everywhere you look. The release of her first album has been a huge success, making her known throughout the world in a matter of hours. Louis knows Harry hasn't seen her since, Taylor always being away for interviews, shows and whatnot. But apparently they have had contact recently—and really why wouldn't they? They are married for heaven's sake—because Harry wouldn't come up with something this awful on his own.

"That doesn't make her worth more than you", Louis counters calmly. Harry clutches his hands and laces their fingers together. The movements make tingles erupt in Louis' body and make him want to shy away at the same time.

"Well, apparently a husband working in a bakery is not what is suitable for a women of her success."

Louis tightens his grip on Harry's hand. Rage is creeping up on him, it's flaring through his veins, all his disliking of this girl suddenly morphing into seething anger. How can she even suggest something like that? She has married Harry being what he is. If she is not okay with what he is doing, she shouldn't have said yes at all.

"Harry, I don't think she has meant—", he tries to reason, but Harry interrupts him.

"She told me to do something more prestigious. Something she wouldn't have to worry about to mention to the media. She meant it, Lou. She said if I can't do something like sing, act or dance, I should at least go to college, but she knows how much—“

his job at the bakery means to him, Louis finishes silently for him. He knows it. They all know that. Harry absolutely loves his job. Louis has visited him there on several occasions and he has never seen Harry more alive. You would have to be blind, deaf and probably dead to not notice just how dearly Harry is in love with his job, and even then it would be hard to ignore.

And he can't believe how Taylor treats Harry's dream. He has never aimed at something high and imposing, he has already worked in a bakery back in high school and he has always said that's exactly what he wants to do. He has never made anyone doubt his conviction. So how can Taylor be so cruel and kick all that with feet?

“So tell her you're not changing your mind about what you want to do.”

Harry sighs again. His shoulders shake as if he is suppressing a sob.

“She will dump me if I do.”

It's in that moment that Louis fully registers that, no matter how Louis has tried not to think about it and no matter how angry he is at Taylor, Harry loves her. He is actually afraid of losing her, of losing the girl he has loved enough to marry, and it's that thought that Taylor knows this exactly and is still such a bitch about things that makes Louis want to rip her apart. He doesn't know where to put all that raging anger that is circling in his veins and pouring out of every pore in his skin. It's so blindingly overwhelming that Louis clutches onto Harry hard for lack of something other to grip until it crumbles to pieces.

“Don't let her order you around”, he says agitated. “Nobody has the right to tell you how to live your life other than yourself.”

“It's what they say, isn't it? But when you're actually confronted with a situation like this, it's not that easy..”

It's enough. Louis doesn't want to hear another word and he won't, no matter how right Harry is. He releases Harry from his embrace and lifts his upper body into a half sitting position. He feels like a has a bit more authority over Harry like this.

“Shut your trap, Harry. We are going to get your mind so off of things, you won't even remember who she is for days. And I don't want to hear any complaints from you. We are going to get you in a good mood, and Taylor can see show she fares without you.”

Harry doesn't get to answer that, because Louis' phone blares suddenly. He pulls it out from his pocket and curses when he sees the number.

“Yeah?”, he says uneloquently when he answers the call. It's Rebecca, the director for the play he is currently starring in, and when she tells him what time it is, he fully understands why she sounds more than a tad irritated.

“Crap”, he curses. “I'll be there in ten, okay? Yeah, yeah, I know I'm late, but it's just rehearsal.. Whoa, calm down!”

He feels Harry chuckle in front of him and he silently punches him on the upper arm for the glee he gets out of seeing Louis writhe in misery.

“Jeez, I got it. It's my fault. I'm coming now. Just shut up, will you?” He ends the call without waiting for her reply. He shouldn't piss off his boss, but she kind of asked for it because she knows Louis doesn't take accusations of any kind very well.

“Someone lost track of time, huh?”, Harry asks, and Louis' heart almost bursts with relief at how much better he sounds all of a sudden. Even the last trace of his devastated voice from before is gone. He just hopes Harry is not that good of an actor. Maybe he can do it, maybe he can make Harry feel at least a little better or distract him for a while. But he can't do that while he is at work, unless..

“Harry, do you want to see the place where I put all my evil genius into action?”

“I'd rather see you burn down the kitchen again. Oh wait, that's the same thing.”

Louis slaps Harry's arm again for good measure. And just like that Taylor is forgotten. For now.

* * *

“You were bloody brilliant, Lou”, Harry praises as soon as they are alone in what is some sort of storage room used for recreation during Louis' break. “I haven't seen you perform in years. You have gotten infinitely better. Less goof and way more serious now.”

Louis smiles at him and has the decency to turn a little red at the compliment (even if forcedly). He knows his method of acting used to be a bit unnerving, always a bit too fake and loud and obnoxious. But ever since he has started doing it as a profession he has learned to control all that overflowing energy into something truly productive.

“Thanks”, he says modestly. They sit together on an unused table. Harry turns slightly in his direction.

“Don't be ridiculous, Lou. This isn't done with a simple thanks. You were amazing. I always thought..” He stops himself at that by biting his lip, but Louis looks at him curiously. Whatever is it, he wants to hear it. “I always thought you'd never be any good at this, but when I see you like this.. You shouldn't be satisfied with theater. You should be put on the big screen.”

Louis wants to be offended by Harry's initial confession, but he can't find it in him. He understands Harry's thinking. Besides, with the way he is complimenting Louis, he can't really be angry at anything.

“It was just rehearsal”, Louis deflects.

Harry turns even more to him, staring at him, and Louis is acutely aware of their hands which are touching now, Harry having moved his own over Louis' where it rests against the tabletop. Tingles start to spread from the point of contact. This feels different from the friendly hug and even the still friendly cuddle they have had earlier this day. There is a spark between them, one that has been there every time they've had sex. The realization sends sparks up and down his spine.

“That's even more amazing, isn't it?”, Harry asks, his very green eyes still staring into Louis' own. “That you got me this captivated with a mere rehearsal.”

At the word 'captivated' Harry's eyes drop down to Louis' lips and Louis can't help gazing at the perfect bow of Harry's lips, too. Their gazes both travel back up after some moments. Louis finds it hard to breathe with how thick the air is with tension. It feels like it's stifling in the small room. Louis has to break the tension, though, because otherwise something might happen. Something that really shouldn't.

“You're still such a sap”, he says lamely, because words have escaped him and he can't think of anything more biting. The corners of Harry's mouth quirk upwards.

“There is this person..”, he drawls slowly. “Who I might have fooled around a bit with and who used to act as if they hated me being sappy but I knew they actually quite liked that. I can't seem to stop since then.”

Louis' heart tries to beat out of his chest. It's the closest they have ever gotten to talk about their past, and having Harry practically breathe things like that into his face with his ridiculously sexy voice is doing absolutely nothing to stop his mind from returning to the time five years ago where Harry has been utterly and undeniably his. He should just have taken what was right in front of him.

Taking is apparently what Harry has in mind, because he dips his head to the side and leans closer to Louis, closer still until their faces connect at the lips. It's a sweet motion, the slow inching forward, and the kiss that Louis couldn't find it in him to prevent is equally as sweet.

They have never taken this much time to just press their lips together, sliding them sensually against each other, since they have met again at Harry's reception. It has always been rushed and filthy and straight to the point. The slow drag of their lips has Louis' heart rate sky-rocketing even more and it makes him remember the one time they have cut classes to sneak into the movies, watching something neither have wanted to see and just use the time for making out in the dark.

He has teased Harry afterwards for hours for being a hopeless sap, but the memory is actually one of Louis' favorite ones. There are mountains of memories with Harry that Louis holds very dear, it is essentially each and every one of them, but back in that cinema Louis has been so in love with Harry, ready to burst with all the emotions and not yet freaking out over it.

And he feels like that all over again. He feels like a fucking teenager having his first make out with someone he thinks he will like for all eternity but will later realize that teenage crushes are not that long-lasting, at least most of them aren't. He feels like a teenager for how his body is alight with hyper awareness for every ghost of a touch from Harry.

There is no urgency in the kisses they exchange, just a slow building burning, like an ache that neither know was there and all they can do to soothe it is to keep kissing in the most sweet and heart-wrenching way possible.

A loud bang on the door finally interrupts them.

“Hey, Louis, you better get your enormous behind back on stage”, Rebecca shouts through the door, and for the first time ever Louis thinks he wouldn't have minded if she had come in and saw what they have been doing.

“Coming right up, boss!”, he calls back. He looks at Harry, but they don't say a thing, and maybe that's good because Louis has no idea what my spill out of him right now. They stare at each other for some more seconds, before Louis slides off the table and silently walks back to the stage, Harry in tow.

* * *

Louis spends the first fifteen minutes of rehearsal brooding over what has happened. It's new and confusing. The previous times he and Harry have touched like that was out of sexual urgency, but this.. there has absolutely been no sexual desire behind it. Emotions is what it was, it has been a connection on a purely emotional level, and Louis doesn't get it.

Harry is in love with Taylor, and maybe there may have been some sexual things the relationship with her has lacked, making Harry come to Louis. He still thinks it has been wrong to do that, but at least that he can understand. Harry's sudden emotional intercourse with him, he doesn't. There have never been feelings involved before (for Harry at least), or have there? Louis is utterly confused.

He only snaps out of it when somebody curses at him for doing everything wrong again, and Louis almost smirks at the probable trueness of that.

* * *

When the second half of rehearsal in which Louis has been completely absorbed after he got rid of his straying thoughts is over, he notices that Harry is no longer sitting in the audience. Louis is a bit bummed that after Harry's fierce praise he seemingly got bored enough to leave. But he decides to not dwell on it.

He finds Harry outside the staff entrance, looking apologetic. He waves his phone around.

“Zayn called, asking if I wanted to come over for supper. I didn't want to disturb your performance, so I went outside.”

Louis smiles at him. “And here I thought my brilliant performance was not to your liking.” Harry seems to want to protest, but Louis just continues. “Anyway, what did you tell Zayn? Are you coming or what?”

Harry's dimple forming is really enough of an answer, and Louis doesn't even get a verbally one, because right then Harry's phone rings anew, startling them both. Louis just needs one look at Harry's face to know who the caller is. The taller bites his lips and looks uncertainly at the display. It's a whimsical decision on Louis' behalf to snatch the phone away and answer it.

“Don't call again until you got your head back straight, got it?”, he says quickly and ends the call right away. And because the phone starts ringing not a second after, he opts to shut it off completely. He tucks it back in Harry's pocket and reaches for his hand.

“Come on, nobody can be glum when they're about to have some of Zayn's food.”

Louis knows his happy mood is forced, and that he forces Harry as well, but right now it's enough for him to protect Harry, even if only a little. He can't stave off the talk with Taylor forever, but Harry should have some time to think before talking to his unstandable wife.


End file.
